March 21 Former Fireman

Edgar Watson Howe once said "If the fools do not control the world, it isn't because they are not in the majority!" This isn't just the most important truism you will hear today, it is also the answer to today's Cryptoquote puzzle in the newspaper. Somewhere in between doing my work, raising my family, playing golf, and screwing up my marriage, I have become addicted to crossword puzzles and cryptoquotes. What's next Jumble? It's not a hobby, let me make that perfectly clear, I don't have hobbies. A hobby is a leisure activity that brings a person pleasure. Every hobby I've ever tried has become a possible career path, from bowling, guitar, golf, you name it, I've attacked it with the goal of becoming pro and hated every minute of it. I have accepted the fact that I will never be a pro golfer, and yet I still work at is as if my livelihood depends upon it. I write songs on my guitar with the belief that someday the masses will be screaming for a middle aged rock star.

This crossword thing is perplexing, I can't begin my day without finishing the morning crossword in less than 20 minutes. I can't go to bed without the evening crossword and cryptoquote. I'm not learning anything at this point. I'm obsessed. OK, I have learned a few things, like when a crossword maker needs a word with a lot of E's, he will rely on a few basic words. 1. Fencing foil...EPEE. 2. a great lake ERIE 3. Scary..EERIE 4. Big shoe size...EEEE. I imagine crossword makers, wringing their hands, and sweating profusely when they finally resort to Big Shoe Size. "I'm holding that one back for the Sunday big crossword!" they must say to themselves.

Maybe if I spent a little less time trying to figure out a 5 letter word for "unvoiced" and a little more time trying to figure out my own psyche, I wouldn't be in the horrible situation I find myself in today. Tacit, the word is tacit. Maybe if I attacked the world's problems with the same vigor, or a cure for cancer, or a really great shoe that slides on and off easily and doesn't set off metal detectors in airports. Maybe if I found a cure for the Flu, which I have right now, and is making write silly things in my blog, then I would be able to write a really good blog, but I am totally unable to do that at the moment and I beg your forgiveness.

But I know that the words I write will be accepted by the wise and eschewed by the ignorant. Just as Moliere said " In clothes as well as in speech, the man of taste will shun all these extremes that give offense." Love that cryptoquote!