Chapter Sixty Four

"Are we go-eeng to Woo-A-Vul?" Bob asked in a very loud voice to Russell. He smiled a giant smile that changed quickly into a look of distress and back to a fresh smile in a period of 10 seconds. His question was greeted with silence.

Bob sat in the front passenger seat of Russell's SUV while Oprah lay stretched out on the bench seat behind him. Russell was staring straight ahead with his fists clenched tightly near the top of the steering wheel. His knuckles were white. His one good eye was darting left and right while his glass one stayed where it was.

A road sign stating "Louisville 30 miles" in giant sized letters came and went.

Bob queried, once again, in a loud voice. "Are we go-eeng to Woo-A-Vul?"

"YES WE ARE GOING TO LOUISVILLE! WE ARE GOING TO LOUISVILLE! WE ARE GOING TO LOUISVILLE!" Russell was not good at keeping his patience with Bob. It wasn't the first time Bob had asked him that question during the trip.

"Goody!" said Bob.

"I bought you a giant book of expert Soduko puzzles to work Bob, why don't you try solving them for a while?" Russell barked.

Bob held up the book and leafed the pages in Russell's face. "I finished it Wussel! See?" The demonstrative way in which Bob showed the pages to Russell blocked his vision momentarily and he swerved across the highway as he batted the puzzle book away from his eye.

"Bob! Don't DO that!" Russell's heart was racing. The hearts of all the drivers he swerved in front of were racing too. People honked their horns and some stuck their hands out of the windows, giving Russell the "finger" to show their dismay. Russell tried to look straight ahead and suffer his indignity.

Bob answered back to the disgruntled travellers with an enormous smile, an animated wave and a hearty "Heeewooooo!!!!"

"Roll up your window please, Bob." Russell said in the calmest voice he could make come out of his giant, volcanic interior.

"Heeeewooo!!!" Shouted Bob.

Oprah awoke, tilted his head and perked his ears. A giant question mark above his brow could easily be imagined. God has given Dogs the ability to speak without words and Oprah was saying what everyone else was thinking. "What the fuck?"

"Why awre we go-eeeng to Woo-A-bill Russell?

"Because Marty's agent called me and told me that we needed to meet Marty at a hotel there. That Marty really wanted us to be there with him."

"Mahtee has an ageent?" These questions had also been asked repeatedly.

"Yes Bob, Marty has an agent."

"Whatd is dis ageents name, Wusso?"

"Cy."

"Ahhhhhhhh." said Bob.

"Why do you keep saying Ahhhh, when I say Cy, Bob? It sounds like you're sigh........never mind." Russell hit himself on the head. It had taken Russell about 50 of these question and answer sessions to figure out what Bob was doing when he heard the name Cy.

Russell wished he was somewhere else. He had even wished he was dead at one point, but he changed his mind after he considered how he wasn't totally prepared to die.

He had tried to play a Country and Western radio station for about 20 minutes but could no longer stand to hear Bob singing along at the top of his lungs. Bob knew all the words to all the songs, probably. It was most likely going to take another 40 minutes until they reached the hotel and Russell was suffering in seconds, not minutes.

"Are we doe-eeng to Voo-A-Bill?"

"Why yes Bob" Russell said calmly. "Yes we are." He tried to imagine the splendor of the Brown Hotel, a legendary Louisville charm piece in the heart of the near south. Room service, hot towels, and 5 star dining. A smile crossed his face. In- room television with Spectravision, the best in pornographic movies. Spank-o-vision! A mini bar. A Concierge. Spectravision.

"Ahre we gooo-ong to Wou-Eh-......"

"Yes Bob, we are."